The Ex-Mormon Forums
http://exmormonforums.com/

My Resignation Journey ~ Update: Missionaries Visited
http://exmormonforums.com/viewtopic.php?f=3&t=52121
Page 1 of 1

Author:  Amunet [ Mon Oct 31, 2016 5:34 pm ]
Post subject:  My Resignation Journey ~ Update: Missionaries Visited

So, I'm going to keep all the info here :)

I sent one of the letter templates (with a few tweaks) to the email address on October 16th 2016.
Just today (Halloween!), I received the "ecclesiastical matter" letter (dated 10.26.16).

So, now I wait.

A bit of background:
The letter was sent on behalf of myself and my (soon to be) ex-husband. I find it slightly annoying that the letter was addressed to me with his last name, but as we don't even have our divorce legal just yet ... I can't be too upset about that ... except that I never actually changed my last name to his (legally or otherwise).
I was brought up in the church from infancy, my mother being a convert and my father also being raised in the church. My parents divorced when I was young, my father went away from the church but my mother stayed and raised me in it. I knew early on the church wasn't for me after primary, that's when real lessons were taught and I was old enough to ask real questions. I was baptized at 8 because I wanted to 'make my mommy proud'. As I grew up, I was privy to the many faces of the church ... good and bad; generosity when we were poor, the bishop watching me when my mother had emergency surgery, the way the women treated my mother without a husband (shunned), how they treated her with a husband (kindly), kids constantly making fun of me, adults always taking pity on me (we were not always poor, but they automatically took pity due to my father not living with us), and the sheer competition and pressure in young-women's.
After becoming an adult, I went away from all religion. I married, was married by a bishop from my mother's ward and we moved to utah for the rest of our Bachelor's degrees. Utah is particularly nasty with keeping up appearances even when the household is crumbling (the medication laws are crazy due to all the xanex all the women are on!). The only time I truly felt accepted into the church was when I went to the ward on my campus and I was married. Soon after, I realized how wrong that was and cut ties with the church (stopped going). This was ... 2010-ish?
It was 2013 when I felt like I needed spiritual nourishment and began researching many different faiths/religions. For a bit, I attended a Universal Universalist church, but decided against joining since you had to pay membership dues ... like a country club. It wasn't until late in the year (around this time actually) that I started my search into Wicca.
Today I identify as a Pagan, a Nature Worshipper that follows a similar path to Wicca (just a few variances).

Due to my spirituality now, I wish to officially be free of my early connections of mormanism so that I can peacefully attain higher spiritual focus and perhaps even help those believe in a branch of Paganism whom are dying.

So now, I hope the process to be reasonably paced since I don't know anyone out here and ... well ... I live in Illinois! Hahaha, you know, land that forced the mormons out? Ahh. Anywho. I don't think I'll have much resistance due to the above and my parents accept my path (my mother was disappointed at first but just wants me to be happy now).
At the very least, we know that they check their emails and accept it as an official avenue of resignation.

Author:  Melanie [ Tue Nov 01, 2016 12:50 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: My Resignation Journey

Ten smiley faces, Congrats!

Author:  productofchoice [ Thu Nov 03, 2016 2:39 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: My Resignation Journey

Congrats Amunet!

Sorry about the divorce. I've been though one myself several years ago. They have plenty of heartache to go around.

Peace

Author:  Amunet [ Thu Nov 03, 2016 6:57 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: My Resignation Journey

I am extremely upset right now. I'm rather shaking.

Missionaries showed up after I explicetly told them not to contact me. I firmly, but politely told them I am well within my right not to talk to them but I opened communication to tell them of my rights and to get the process going. One of the missionaries said that a bishop would have to come for the record removal and I was very firm on saying that I do not have to do that.

I'm shaking, I'm so upset.

They were looking for my ex (we're roommates with my boyfriend) but not me. But, I am here so I had to handle it and I'm just shaking.
Where do I even go for legal council on this matter?

Author:  Rainfeather [ Thu Nov 03, 2016 7:13 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: My Resignation Journey ~ Update: Missionaries Visited

I think that religious organizations are quite protected when it comes to soliciting.

It's galling that they make us have to do it, but sometimes you almost have to be downright rude to them, because anything else is taken as at least a "maybe."

I'm usually a very polite person, but I'd basically tell them to take a hike.

Author:  Amunet [ Thu Nov 03, 2016 7:20 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: My Resignation Journey ~ Update: Missionaries Visited

Rainfeather wrote:
I think that religious organizations are quite protected when it comes to soliciting.

It's galling that they make us have to do it, but sometimes you almost have to be downright rude to them, because anything else is taken as at least a "maybe."

I'm usually a very polite person, but I'd basically tell them to take a hike.


Yes, I told them as much, just ... well. I brought up legal rights but did so in a polite/professional manner. My boyfriend was surprised how I handled it lol I told him it was because of my years in customer service (which I received much recognition for quality customer service). I know they understood, I think I scared them (their eyes were like saucers) but I didn't blow my top or outright said 'take a hike'. Though, I did say that I am well within my rights not to talk to them but I am doing so out of courtesy to make sure my voice is heard and I made it blatently clear that I do not want any further contact.

Thank you for responding though, I'm pretty upset and quite literally shaken. Your words help :)

Author:  Rainfeather [ Thu Nov 03, 2016 8:00 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: My Resignation Journey ~ Update: Missionaries Visited

The only reason I said to tell them to basically take a hike is because I've seen so many stories of people trying to politely tell them that their attention is not wanted, but they just don't take, "No," for an answer.

Sometimes anything short of being rude is taken as an invitation to keep trying. I hope the polite business-like approach will be enough in your case. Sometimes it just escalates though. I hope not.

But hon, try not to give them the power to upset you so much. I know it's not easy though.

Author:  productofchoice [ Fri Nov 04, 2016 1:35 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: My Resignation Journey ~ Update: Missionaries Visited

Elders tried to contact us several times after sending in out letter and getting confirmation that we are out.

Turns out that because my x didn't sign with my kids they were not removed. They are on the records even though they (as minors) asked for removal.

So there was occasional contact attempts because of the kids and the obligations that they felt to "help" them.

One day elders dropped by and this is when we learned about this ... my wife said we resigned and asked why they dropped by and we learned about the kids. Would have liked to know sooner. Anyway, we invited them and we "shared a message about Jesus" with them for a half hour or longer. The senior elder was rattled, the new one friended us on facebook and had some other discussions later but we enjoyed that. They don't come by anymore. I suspect they consider us a threat.

Which is the second way you can get them to leave you alone, to have a contagious case of apostasy.

Peace

Author:  Amunet [ Tue Dec 06, 2016 8:41 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: My Resignation Journey ~ Update: Missionaries Visited

Well, it seems the message I gave them was concise :) I felt a little bad being so repetitive (they looked scared, they started stepping off my porch), I wasn't rude or yelling or anything ... just ... poignant.

Anyways, I received my letter a little bit ago but ... I AM NOW NO LONGER A MEMBER OF THE MORMON CHURCH!!!

I'm so excited ^_^

Author:  Melanie [ Wed Dec 07, 2016 12:50 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: My Resignation Journey ~ Update: Missionaries Visited

Wonderful, Congratulations :-D

Author:  productofchoice [ Wed Dec 07, 2016 3:53 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: My Resignation Journey ~ Update: Missionaries Visited

Congrats!

Author:  Rainfeather [ Wed Dec 07, 2016 8:41 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: My Resignation Journey ~ Update: Missionaries Visited

Congratulations. :)

Page 1 of 1 All times are UTC - 7 hours [ DST ]
Powered by phpBB® Forum Software © phpBB Group
http://www.phpbb.com/